During a recent family visit, we got on a topic that nearly made me give up on our newest generation of adults. Well, that was until I realized there are even dumber people out there. You know those ones you meet, they open their mouths and your first thought is WTF is wrong with you?
I was reading something on google and it lead to an article about young women soaking tampons in vodka then shoving them up their hoo ha. First my brain tried to fathom what kind of dumbass would do this, then it just gave at the sheer stupidity of it all. Apparently the result is getting drunk with having alcohol on your breath. How damn bad do you wanna get drunk?
Being a life long Jack drinker (for the pleasure of the taste not a need to get drunk) I don’t have a lot of experience with vodka, but then I don’t have a lot of experience with shoving alcohol anywhere but my mouth so I had to know what complete fool would do this. Apparently you can get extremely drunk by soaking a tampon in vodka and shoving it up your twat because of the thinness of the skin in that area. I can’t even begin to think of the pain involved with this whole idea.
I started thinking this is even dumber than doing those nutty coffee colon cleanses. In case you don’t know, it’s an enema using coffee. Supposed to recharge you. I will say I can’t comment as I love coffee but I find drinking it much better tasting than shoving a tube of it up my ass and watching shit filled coffee come back out.
Well you know how my mind works so next thing I know I’m thinking hell how about a color cleanse with bourbon? Seems like that would recharge you but that would take any even bigger idiot that the one that shoved vodka up with crotch and a huge waste of bourbon.
Little did I know this is actually a thing. It’s called “butt chugging” and yes, it involves squirting liquor up your asshole. Why you ask? Well who the hell knows. Who’s the first person that went to pour themselves an after dinner drink and thought heck maybe I’ll squirt this up my poop hole instead? Well it damn sure wasn’t Einstein cause that is some stupid shit, no pun intended.
After going down that rabbit hole and learning more about butt chugging than I ever wanted to know, I decided there are just some damn ignorant people in this world and unfortunately it’s legal for them to breed. If you decide to try any of these ideas please know I do not endorse them mainly because it requires an IQ of 34 or less to even consider it.
Hell, I may have actually figured out why these morons eat Tide pods. Cleans all that shit out of them.
Peace out fellow chuggers. Signed Slightly
signedslightly@gmail.com
Inner Thoughts of a Self Diagnosed Slightly Sociopathic Mind 